Embodying Awakening Through the Bliss Mess of Intimacy

In this recent cycle of intense initiation offered through being in relationships, their deepenings or completions and digestion along the way......I’ve been feeling deeply into the terrain of spiritual distortion and authentic embodiment, where soul gifts can easily be hijacked by parts still operating from trauma, unmet needs, or subtle strategies for survival.

There’s been a clarifying light cast on narcissistic overlays within spiritual paths, where persona masks as truth, and where parts of self—or disembodied, fear-based entities—take the stage in the absence of true emotional digestion or embodied humility.

So much of what passes for awakening can still be performance… a theater of superficial insights, commoditization, and ego-based strategies, rather than lived, authentic, and embodied transformation.

Without the tender, messy, consistent work of parts integration through embodiment, we remain susceptible to spiritual bypassing, to bypassed pain dressing itself up in divine language, or even to parasitic energies masquerading as guides. This can lead to entire “realities” and even relationships built on inflated narratives, distrust of real intimacy, and disembodied hierarchies that resist grounded love, commitment, and meaningful connection.

What’s been arising in me is a deep honoring for the path of true integration—where what we say and what we live begin to align; where parts of us are not used to justify fragmentation, but instead come into loving, grounded relationship with each other. Where being human is not seen as a flaw, but as the portal into REAL divinity. Where the human heart and emotional body are honored as gateways, not obstacles to bypass or fix.

What I’ve been seeing more clearly through the being in and then ending/completing of karmic loops with others over the years in service and in community is how relational intimacy really does become the crucible for this integration process and true embodiment.

You can do profound inner work alone, or sporadically by attending gateway spiritual events or engaging in healing sessions… but without being felt, mirrored, and lovingly challenged by trusted others in day-to-day life, I would offer that much of it remains untested. A kind of processing bubble can form—a comfortable incubator for a phase, but one that doesn’t truly lead to rebirth.

Parts of us—especially 3D/4D self and ego—can simulate integration, narrate healing, or even perform vulnerability. But it’s in the relational field that deeper fragmentation reveals itself. It’s in the mirroring of others’ hearts, needs, and rawness (and even their projections or judgments) that parts of us are truly challenged to see, feel, transform, and upgrade.

It is in these bliss-messy relational grounds where the bypass becomes visible, and where the unresolved pain tends to lash out, collapse, or withdraw when met with resonance that doesn’t bend to it. It is in these moments that our Divine Self can really arise to respond to the dissonance, the hurt, the fear—that only deeply bonded relationships seem to bring forward.

This is not something that can be learned or 'activated', yet only called forth out of deep readiness and necessity to be felt/known and loved by with others, yourself and the Divine.

Karmic binds and bonds can bring immense transformation as they resolve, yet when a soul isn’t ready to move from narrative into embodiment, those loops become exhausting. They replay until one (or both) finally chooses coherence over fusion, truth over performance, and frequency over familiarity.

What I’m left with again is a deep reverence for—and ongoing choice of—true intimacy as an initiatory fire… not just soft and heavenly in the way many imagine it, but warm, fierce, and clarifying. Intimacy where you stay in the room even when it is challenging and parts of you want to run, hide, or fight. Intimacy where these parts of you can come to trust that love is not the harmful or codependent kind that they knew before yet CAN be different. Where it is safe to be vulnerable inside more and more and, therefore, with others.

This is what I have lived every moment with my counterpart Raphael for many years, and within a small soul family community field together. And THIS is what has offered me more growth, more transformation and more ongoing embodiment of my divine self than anything else.

Intimacy doesn’t allow the old strategies to survive. It calls all parts forward. It demands consistency between the words spoken and the life lived. And while that can feel threatening to Inner Protectors, Gatekeepers, and ego-based personas, it is also the portal into the kind of love and union that no longer requires distortion to survive. The kind of love that invites soul bigness forward not as a concept, but as a necessity for love to keep transacting.

Now, in the quiet after a karmic unraveling through completion with a soul who had been with us off and on for several years, there is space. Space not just to rest and integrate, but to radiate. A field is emerging—clear, grounded, undistorted—where intimacy is no longer effortful, and coherence no longer has to be fought for.

This is not utopia. It is earned alignment. A soul family field where transparency is safe, parts are welcomed but not weaponized, and love no longer negotiates with distortion to keep connection alive.

Here, embodiment hums in the ordinary and the sacred alike.

Here, we are not performing healing—we are living wholeness.

Not drawing others in through force or need, but allowing resonance to find its natural way home.

The era of false , wound-based or superficial bonding is completing. And something luminous, simple, loving, and quietly sovereign is taking root in its place.

If you are sensing these shifts too… if old strategies are falling away, if once-comfortable loops and current relationships now feel unbearable, if you’re craving relational depth that invites your whole self to show up—know that you’re not alone. You may not find this field in many places yet, but it is emerging.

There are others like us walking the path of embodied wholeness, transparent intimacy, and devotion to truth beyond persona. You don’t need to perform to be included here. You only need to be ready to be real.

Resonance will do the rest.

Love,

Jelelle